I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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