after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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