Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
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