2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize