i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
