Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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