its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
