She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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