he wants to bone in the snuggie
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
