left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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