there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
