Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
