dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Randomize
