What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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