I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
