I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Randomize