I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
