She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize