where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Randomize
