you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
