I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
this hospital has no fireball
Do you remember whose house we're in?
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Randomize