if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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