Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
