I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
It's shark week go big or go home
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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