Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
