So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
