I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize