i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
