The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I'm bleeding and have questions
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Randomize
