If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Randomize
