i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Be still, my beating vagina.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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