Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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