When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
