I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
