I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
