Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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