I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize
