Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
