Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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