Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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