Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Your penis caused this!
Randomize
