if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize
