how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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