sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Randomize