Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
