I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
