she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize
