White coat. Heels.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
