Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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