Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
Sober January is a disaster.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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