i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
